Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Lord, You Can Take Me Home Now, If You Wish

The Lord can take me home anytime as He sees fit. Of course that has always been true but now I have tasted Heaven.

I tried the Pioneer Woman's steak sauce, a (literally) heart stopping experience. If I ate this more than once per month my arteries would be closed beyond repair and my backside would be two axe handles across. And my butt and my arms and legs are the only part of me that's still skinny. I used to have to dance around in the shower just to get wet enough for the soap.

I did not have a ribeye in the freezer so I settled(!) for a big ol' sirloin steak. Then a big yellow onion and a half stick of real butter. Lead me not into temptation...Oh, never mind right this second.

Slice up the onion and put it in the frying pan over high heat with the melted butter. Stir it around until it is nicely brown and caramelized. I'm not even sure what that means but Rhee said it and I have yet to catch her in a lie, I have caught her trying to kill me with recipes, though.

Anyhow, once those onions are nice and brown and (I hope caramelized, whatever that is) reduce the heat to simmer and then add three quarters to a full cup of heavy (whipping) cream. Listen! Do you hear the sound of arteries clogging?

Stir this around while the sauce reduces by about half. Meanwhile the steak is cooking. Rhee uses one of those fancy griddles with ribs and cooks the steak on the stovetop with (help me Lord!) more butter.I broiled mine. Without added butter. I mean I'd like to live until, I dunno, Christmas? Maybe even until Josiah is in his late teens and the girls all notice those eyes.

When the cream, butter and onion sauce has reduced by about half it is time to put a half cup of crumbled Bleu Cheese. My local supermarket sells Bleu Cheese (is this supposed to be capitalized?) in five ounce packages. Since five ounces is just over a half cup I gave each dog a couple of the larger chunks, poured it in and continued to stir around until the cheese is melted and well mixed.

Now put it on a plate and place the cooked steak on it. Oh my! Someone help me!

In my defense, if such is possible, I used much less sour cream, butter and sharp cheddar cheese than I normally do. If my bite of potato was too bare I scooped up a tad of Rhee's Sinful Sauce with it.

I think the next time I try this I will make fix some kind of vegetable medley and no potato. Oh, and that steak and baked potato were two meals, over two days. I am, even if married, not that suicidal.

Anyhow, oh lord it was good. The only downside, beside making me into a gluttonous pig, is that when I went to microwave the leftovers there was a thick layer of melted butter over all the sauce and I could not figure out how to stir it back in. Of course this was no major problem, it worked fine for dipping a forkful of potato. And Cochise' Apache Princess did not complain a bit about the plate with steak scraps, leftover sauce and the separated out butter on that plate. I should have bemembered to shoot a pic or two of her doing the prewash cycle.

I am not quite sure how Rhee plans on getting into Heaven after spreading recipes like this, nor I for helping to publicize them. I do hope He will forgive us and bear in that great mind that I will be exercising this gluttonous recipe rarely.

I do fear, slightly, that after this my normal marinade of lemon pepper, garlic and soy sauce will seem inadequate. Please, everyone note that I make no claim of originality for this sauce, all I did was follow Rhee's directions. Will y'all be kind enough to not tell Linda Lou or her husband that I am now in love again?

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