Wednesday, February 01, 2012

National Cut On Peter With Scalpels Week!

 So all my docs decided to do everything this week.  Tuesday I was in far north Dallas at a very smart surgeons getting a Squamous Cell Carcinoma removed from my forehead. This is better known as a skin cancer, it's one of several varieties. This coming Tuesday I have to go back and get another little skin cancer removed from my left temple. This is a different sort.of sore which name escapes me but is considered less dangerous than the one cut out yesterday.

 Today, though, was the big adventure. I went in and had a little hernia repaired where my innards were trying to escape near my belly button. Then, because I cannot just get fat like a normal old guy, no, I get these little (and big) things called Lipomas. Well, anyhow I had three on my belly that had more or less grown together so, while the other surgeon (not as smart as the skin cancer guy) was there, he cut those out too.

 The reason one of the surgeons is smarter than the other is the guy doing the skin cancer removals just about never has to drop everything and rush to the hospital in the middle of the night. Also, all the the nurses, aids and receptionists in his office are stone cuties.

 So, anyhow, I'm sitting around with humongous bandages all over me, still coming down from the assorted and sundry drugs. The skin cancer was a local, I never went to sleep. Today, out like a light. Woke up, well, came to, having not been allowed anything to eat or drink since, I dunno, maybe April 1953 or so, ragingly hungry and with one of those no caffeine headaches. I griped and said I needed coffee and a sammich, they gave me ice chips and a little baggie of wheat thins. I did not kill anyone, though, I reckon I'm mellowing in my old age.

 Eventually they told me I should eat broth the next couple of days. I mentioned something about broth's tired gray ass. So the nurse talked about the possibility being uncomfortable if I ate real food and I told her of the certainty of being uncomfortable if I didn't get something to eat. I won.

 Eventually they helped me get dressed and after I proved that I could walk the sat me in a wheelchair and the cutie wheeled me out the door

 Linda Lou cannot drive yet, she can barely get in the passenger seat, the driver's seat, the leg on that side can't swing up there yet.

 So, Patsy, my neighbor was kind enough to drive me. When we escaped from there I took her to a joint called Freebird's World Burrito. It was my first visit although I'd been passing the place for months saying I'm gonna stop there sometime and check it out. Well, today was the day. Oh My Sweet Lord. To get a burrito first one pick the size and type of tortilla. They start with sort of large and go up from there through large, humongous, and feed all the starving children of Asia that my Momma was always talkin' about back when I was a kid. I ordered the large and by the time that chubby little Mexican cutie was done that thing was the size and shape of a can of Campbell's Chunky Soup.

 It turns out that, unbeknownst to me, Patsy's son in law's best pal started the chain and she ate at the one down where he lives about every time she goes to visit. She did not know of the existence of this one. Anyhow, two people can eat a pretty fair dinner for ten to fifteen bucks, plus the price of the beer, if one drinks beer, which I don't anymore. I do eat though.

 And I had no discomfort from the real food. I did get some major league comfort from eating.

 So, from there we went to our little bantam weight supermarket's pharmacy and I turned in my scrip for some Vicoden, I sat there reading one of their magazines until it was ready and then we came home. It's kind of an adventure when one goes over speed bumps when full of new incisions. But with one of the Vicodens (I'm allowed two at a time but it doesn't hurt that bad) I do not care. Oddly I'm not sleepy, even though my sleep schedule is all cattywampus. I'm getting up when I'm used to going to bed. It's lucky that I'm only a pretend vampire, all my doctor's appointments are during daylight.

 So, anyhow, I'm kinda goofy from the meds but I'm not eating broth.


pamibe said...

Good to hear that you came through another round of the men with scalpels! Around here we refer that to 'scraping off the barnacles'. ;)

And I'm with you; if I can't have real food life just loses its color... :D

Mrs. Who said...

Dang, they breed 'em tough in Texas. Hope you continue to have a good recovery...