Tuesday, June 07, 2011

My Computer Has The Fantods

I can't get online much because the old computer that I plugged in when my new computer got bit with a bad virus of some sort now has a bad case of the screaming fantods. We are, for the next few months, stuck with dialup. And, out here, that means aol. Every other Internet provider with dialup is long distance from here. Now I wasn't exactly a big fan of aol even before Huffington took over the place, it's worse now. Still, a few months and we'll have something else.

My problem is that my computer starts just computing away at something no one is telling it to do. Further, I sign on to Firefox and the firefox window won't stay on Firefox. Even on this, Linda Lou's computer. Sigh.

Anyhow, I do not know what waol is. Whatever it is, it takes over and won't turn loose. I fight with it and then it comes up "program not responding" on me and when I hit the end now button, it won't end. Even pushing the big button on the front of the computer won't work, I have to unplug it.

What I have to do is figure out why Firefox won't give me a Firefox screen. Oddly, on this, Linda Lou's computer, which she guards jealously when she's awake, Firefox gives me an "Inbox" screen and I keep asking for Firefox.

Meanwhile we seem to have picked up something awful, a while back my sister called, out of the blue, because she got an E-mail from our aol account, swearing up and down that I needed everyone to send money because I'd been robbed at gunpoint in London. Now we haven't been able to buy enough gas to go to that little six stool lunch counter in Hugo, Oklahoma but we're supposed to have driven to Great Britain?

This on top of the person or persons who bought a plane ticket to Cairo, Egypt. Now folks, I don't fly. And if I did fly, there isn't enough in our bank account to fly to Cairo, Illinois.

So, anyhow, I won't be around much until we get this all sorted out. Oddly we were still paying for a three year contract with Norton Antivirus. The folks in India and I were getting to be quite the friends as I kept trying to explain to them that my antivirus didn't work and they kept telling me that they couldn't help it because of my slow Internet connection. So, I asked for my money back, they said that THAT was not a tech support issue. So, here I am with a very expensive computer, on which payments are still due, a three year antivirus contract, on which payments are still due, and the computer won't work because of a virus infection which I cannot afford to make go away. Sigh.

Meanwhile I had much to say about Weinergate. and much to say about the anniversary of the Battle of Midway and D-Day. The anniversary of the battle of the Valley of the Greasy Grass, aka Little Big Horn is coming up, too.

In other news the Physical Terrorists are taking a lot out of me. They are adding weight to the weight machines, adding more exercises and, generally workin' me like an old Missouri mule. I told the little girl Physical Terrorist who has more muscles than I do that if she kept workin' me like a rented mule I was gonna forget I'm housebroke.. Poor girl didn't understand. So I asked her if she'd ever seen a housebroke mule. Heck, the poor girl didn't know exactly what a mule is. This in Greenville, Texas where folks were still using mules right up til Ike was President.

I'm gettin' old. Oh well, when I was a kid people not much older than I am now were talking about how it was during Teddy Roosevelt's Presidency.

The good news? They might build a muscle on me. I have been resisting putting our new laptop online here at home but, I might as well. We got it so Linda Lou could get online at the hospitals, not that she did, very much. Might as well use it, by the time we're able to go anywhere it will be obsolete.


Anonymous said...

Infernal machines is right. I only know enough to surf a little. Glad to know you and Linda are still kicking around, though.

pamibe said...

Avast antivirus and Microsoft Security Essentials. Both free.

For bots, Malwarbytes and Spybot. Also both free.

Firefox with Noscript.

Never had a bug while running the above. It's a job just keeping our machines running clean these days!

Oh, and waol is aol. And yes, it's taken over your machine. Unless you reload you'll never get rid of it all.

I don't have any more good news... aren't you glad? ;)

Anonymous said...

Hang tough Peter, things may just be on a slow rebound for sure. I have a friend that’s going through the “Physical Terrorist” stage after having a new hip installed. They told him he’s doing so well with therapy that he can stop his home exercise program. No sooner have they done that than they increased the weights and repetitions for his twice-a-week PT with them, and it’s killing him!

As for me, I had better get out and walking for thirty to sixty minutes a day or at least five days a week. I can’t believe how I have gone down hill since retiring. Just walking around home you feel strong and able but when I have do go out and do some serious walking I really feel week and clumsy. I guess that old saying holds true for many things . . . “Use It or Lose It”.

As for AOL, huh, they are still trying to bill me more than ten years after I quit them. I called them way back when and said I’m through terminate my account today. They kept saying “no you don’t have to quit us, you can stay on without charge” I said no I’m through with AOL and I’m going with cable. At least once a year I get a bill from them for a time after I quit them, go figure.

I hope you get the computer situation straightened away, we sure would miss you out here. All the best to you and Linda Lou. We read you all the time and enjoy the humor you spice your writing up with.

Ron from Massachusetts